In an infinite cosmos where I can’t be with you
The red moon swirls and collapses, swirls, and collapses, a spear as long as the heavens seep deep within, mutating through its existence. Longinus, the name, however, it’s lost within the infinite corridors of time. The sheer emptiness is baffling, such a joke that rather than being funny it fills you with eternal despair, so long and so heavy, even though such concepts are long gone it’s forever sewed within the collective unconscious. The collective unconscious, the gods, the demons, the man, the animal, the rock, the sword, the gun, the wheel, the wings, the sounds, the records, the memories, the events. the adjectives, the pronouns, the masks, the personas everything. We are now part of it, directly, indescribably connected. The wall that divides us is no more, no red bricks stacked by the poor, no rays of magnetic dissonance, no emotional incompatibility. Has true peace not been achieved?
Or was it simply the collapse of individuality?
The sand brushes through, moving, rippling like water, it doesn’t hide anything, what does it have to hide? I made sure nothing has to be hidden anymore. Everything is everything, nothing is nothing. It’s all simple now.
It was too hard, too painful, too alone. It hurt, it hurt, it hurt, it hurt.
Everyone hurt me, I hurt me, no one hurt me, yet I felt hurt. There was no escape. I coudn’t take it. Your love, your pain. your caress, your hate.
The train moved, red light spread all over me as if my despair colored everything.
You loved it so much, me, my sadness, the watermelons, the disgusting smell of warm penguins, canned alcohol, now there’s nothing. Only we remain.
Everyone, yet no one. A giant infinite spasm of thought. Is this what I wanted? No. But I rejected everything else. I coudn’t take it. Not me, I only wavered, but I had reached Thanatos. I am the man who sold the world. What am I? Am I the moon? The swirl around it? The spear? It doesn’t matter. Nothing really matters here, in this infinite cosmos where I can’t be with you.
